The Crawl In

[Dorset]

7 games to go and I have done some of that 'puter stuff to predict if we will be playing in Europe news year - the computer says NO!.

For Champions Leagues football we have to be in the top 5 if the City if there ban is not overturned we ain't catching Leicester so I didn't bother to include them. The bastrad computer says:

United 69 points 4th
Chelsea 68 Points 5th
Wolves 61 points 6th
Tottenham 58 points 7th

Of course anything could happen and we could even finish 4th.

 

[skiathospurs]

7 games to go and I have done some of that 'puter stuff to predict if we will be playing in Europe news year - the computer says NO!.

For Champions Leagues football we have to be in the top 5 if the City if there ban is not overturned we ain't catching Leicester so I didn't bother to include them. The bastrad computer says:

United 69 points 4th
Chelsea 68 Points 5th
Wolves 61 points 6th
Tottenham 58 points 7th

Of course anything could happen and we could even finish 4th.

7th could be europe?maybe even 8th,with city winning the league cup 2 places go to the league,and if a top 7 side win the fa cup then 3 places to the league for europa,which depending on city could be 8th place.Which is about where I think we will finish.

 

[Dorset]

OK, so the Mystic Meg 'puter predictions were bolloxed 'cos I included the FA Cup games - doh! Here's an updated table including the goons and Sheffield United:

I reckon we can take 6th place away from Wolves, but I can't see us doing any better than that. My 'puter has both us and the goons winning 3 of the last 7, with us drawing the remaining 4 - but if we win them all? Not much really, we still only get 6th, behind United on goal difference, but the goons could drop as low as 13th!

 

[Dorset]

I've run some more numbers based on the teams who have chances of top 5, Liverpool and City are nailed on of course. There are the important games between the contenders:

Running the prediction stuff again, with various teams winning all their remaining games and the others staying as predicted (50% wrong already as the machine said Brighton v United would be a draw!).

Spurs win all their remaining games:

The Goons win all their remaining games:

Sheffield win all their remaining games:

Wolves win all their remaining games:

United win all their remaining games:

 

[Dorset]

.... of course, if we win all our games and Leicester / United fuck up then we could get 4th or 5th. What happens if the Leicester team get locked-down nobody knows, maybe the league will be cancelled after all? That would be so funny as the Dippers would be stripped of the title and the reactions would be priceless.

 

[skiathospurs]

.... of course, if we win all our games and Leicester / United fuck up then we could get 4th or 5th. What happens if the Leicester team get locked-down nobody knows, maybe the league will be cancelled after all? That would be so funny as the Dippers would be stripped of the title and the reactions would be priceless.

everton smashing leics at the moment!!

 

[Style And Glory]

What was Krul thinking?
The team is desperate for points, can't score on the road, so he gifts Arse a goal.

 

[Dave]

Interesting result tonight at West Ham...its a faint hope but a win v Sheffield Utd would bring us within 6 points of the chavs....and maybe just maybe all is not lost ??

 

[Style And Glory]

Interesting result tonight at West Ham...its a faint hope but a win v Sheffield Utd would bring us within 6 points of the chavs....and maybe just maybe all is not lost ??

It's a massive game (as all of them are).
SU is experiencing a bit of a wobble right now but hopefully we aren't the tonic.
Let's just get passed this one game at a time.

 

[Dorset]

Interesting result tonight at West Ham...its a faint hope but a win v Sheffield Utd would bring us within 6 points of the chavs....and maybe just maybe all is not lost ??

Revised 'If we win: ALL our games' predictions after last night's results:

That would be really close, and United could easily drop a point or two. The 'puter says United wlll win all their remaining games expect the one against Leicester wot it says will be a draw. If it goes to goal difference then we are of course fucked - we could probably catch the Chavs if they drop points, but the other contenders will be out of reach? I'll update this again tomorrow with hopefully good news.

 

[Yid]

Revised 'If we win: ALL our games' predictions after last night's results:

View attachment 1236

That would be really close, and United could easily drop a point or two. The 'puter says United wlll win all their remaining games expect the one against Leicester wot it says will be a draw. If it goes to goal difference then we are of course fucked - we could probably catch the Chavs if they drop points, but the other contenders will be out of reach? I'll update this again tomorrow with hopefully good news.

Stop it now....

This is the little chink of hope that digs its way into your heart and makes you believe, just a little bit...!!!

I've no time for my heart being ripped from my chest again...

Please stop.

 

[Dorset]

Stop it now....

This is the little chink of hope that digs its way into your heart and makes you believe, just a little bit...!!!

I've no time for my heart being ripped from my chest again...

Please stop.

No. I will give you my statistics when you take them from my cold dead hands. Ignoring stuff does not make it go away despite what Mr Trumpty thinks. personally I think we have two chances - fuck all and a little bit less than fuck all and I don't see much hope in the 'predictions' which are fucking useless anyway because if I could write an algorithm to successfully predict football results I'd have so many Euroquids that I would be a able to get someone else to post them and wouldn't have to waste my own time telling people to fuck off when they asked me to stop posting them.

Always look on the bright side of life eh? Fuck that for a game of soldiers.

 

[Yid]

No. I will give you my statistics when you take them from my cold dead hands. Ignoring stuff does not make it go away despite what Mr Trumpty thinks. personally I think we have two chances - fuck all and a little bit less than fuck all and I don't see much hope in the 'predictions' which are fucking useless anyway because if I could write an algorithm to successfully predict football results I'd have so many Euroquids that I would be a able to get someone else to post them and wouldn't have to waste my own time telling people to fuck off when they asked me to stop posting them.

Always look on the bright side of life eh? Fuck that for a game of soldiers.

You know im joking mate.

 

[Dorset]

You know im joking mate.

Of course, so am I. You do know me by know, I am almost always just taking the piss. If we were infantile children we could use those fuck-awful emoji thing or use one of those internet acronyms like the kiddies do, but we are grown ups so fuck that.!

 

[Yid]

Of course, so am I. You do know me by know, I am almost always just taking the piss. If we were infantile children we could use those fuck-awful emoji thing or use one of those internet acronyms like the kiddies do, but we are grown ups so fuck that.!​

 

[skiathospurs]

Stop it now....

This is the little chink of hope that digs its way into your heart and makes you believe, just a little bit...!!!

I've no time for my heart being ripped from my chest again...

Please stop.

Know what you mean mate

 

[Dave]

Know what you mean mate

Ringer for Jaap Stam.

 

[Style And Glory]

It's a massive game (as all of them are).
SU is experiencing a bit of a wobble right now but hopefully we aren't the tonic.
Let's just get passed this one game at a time.

Just the tonic

 

[Dorset]

OK @Yid, I will stop teasing you with hope. I just run the doomsday scenario where we lose all our remaining games, totally possible after that shit-show tonight - and we could end up 15th if the teams below us have a reasonable few games. How has everything turned to poo in two seasons?

 

[Yid]

OK @Yid, I will stop teasing you with hope. I just run the doomsday scenario where we lose all our remaining games, totally possible after that shit-show tonight - and we could end up 15th if the teams below us have a reasonable few games. How has everything turned to poo in two seasons?

Depresses the fuck out of me.... everything about our club has gone from absolute top notch to absolute fucking shit...

 

[skiathospurs]

New kit for the run in.

 

[Dave]

New kit for the run in.

Jesus...ha ha...CAN YOU HEAR ME PAST THAT SHIRT ?

 

[skiathospurs]

 

[Yid]

SNAP...

 

[Dorset]

Mystic Meg - latest predictions:

The Goal differences are not a predictions by the mega-brain computer, they are the current Gds and are used to sort the teams tied on 56. The computer reckons that we will beat Bournemouth and Palace, draw with the goons and Leicester and lose to Newcastle - ouch! Of course we could still win all our remaining games - then it looks like this:

 

[Yid]

Mystic Meg - latest predictions:

View attachment 1247

The Goal differences are not a predictions by the mega-brain computer, they are the current Gds and are used to sort the teams tied on 56. The computer reckons that we will beat Bournemouth and Palace, draw with the goons and Leicester and lose to Newcastle - ouch! Of course we could still win all our remaining games - then it looks like this:

View attachment 1248

9th.... or 8th .... ooooooooo...!!!

Send the kids out and sell the fucking first team for glue.

 

[Dorset]

9th.... or 8th .... ooooooooo...!!!

Send the kids out and sell the fucking first team for glue.

I am optimistic and I reckon we'll just about scrape 7th, with a bit of luck.

 

[skiathospurs]

I am optimistic and I reckon we'll just about scrape 7th, with a bit of luck.

Micheal Oliver will be the referee for the NLD

 

[Dorset]

I added some more teams to the 'Fight for 6th' calculations, my code is working better now, the last 6 games were all predicted correctly, that probably means that all the rest will be totally fucekd up, luckily football is not predictable or it wouldn't be worth playing. Anyway, IF the matches go as predicted tenths is what the scramble will look like:

SEVEN teams within 3 points of each other all trying to get that 6th spot (Europa League?),so a single slip-up now means that the race is over. On the other hand one result better than the prediction could seal the deal. The 'puter current has us beating Bournemouth and Palace, drawing against Arsenal, Newcastle and Leicester. So, by just beating the goons, and IF all the other results go as predicted, we get 6th and they slip to 9th.

 

[Dorset]

Aplogies to @Yid but here's the predictions after tonight's games: