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The Dorset Vineyard

Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
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1,222
#1
I haven't started a thread about wine-making here yet, I'm sure everyone has been eagerly awaiting that. Well, the wait is over!

Today I will be bottling the 2016 Blackberry wine wot I made last year. There are fucking grillions of blackberries out on the hedgerows at the moment, so if last year's vintage doesn't taste like cat piss I will be starting another batch this week. The 7 year old Wheat and Carrot wine I made is still sitting in its bottles waiting for a victim. That fucker is 23% ABV and tasted like soap mixed with turps when I bottled it. It was a challenge to make a fuck-off, head bending wine that had a bit more poke that the 12% piss you buy in the shops. I managed to ferment the fuck out of it using some seriously hard as nails canadian yeast, but I don't think it will ever be drinkable by human beans, but maybe @Thfcire might like a bottle next time we meet?

My 6 year old Sloe win is now drinkable, that fucker takes fucking ages to mature, the first year it is so dry it strips the lining of your mouth off but becomes less lethal as the years go by. Luckily young folks can't be fucked waiting, I met a whippersnapper of around 40 last year while I was harvesting the brambles and he thought he would make some until I told him that it would take at least 2 years before it was good to go. lazy impatient cunts.

Obviously I don't drink as much as I did before I had my little health wobble, Mrs D makes sure of that, but I still like to make wine, it's handy to give a bottle as a present to people you don't really like - yep, that is almost the entire population of the planet.
 
J.spurs

J.spurs

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Likes
536
#2
I haven't started a thread about wine-making here yet, I'm sure everyone has been eagerly awaiting that. Well, the wait is over!

Today I will be bottling the 2016 Blackberry wine wot I made last year. There are fucking grillions of blackberries out on the hedgerows at the moment, so if last year's vintage doesn't taste like cat piss I will be starting another batch this week. The 7 year old Wheat and Carrot wine I made is still sitting in its bottles waiting for a victim. That fucker is 23% ABV and tasted like soap mixed with turps when I bottled it. It was a challenge to make a fuck-off, head bending wine that had a bit more poke that the 12% piss you buy in the shops. I managed to ferment the fuck out of it using some seriously hard as nails canadian yeast, but I don't think it will ever be drinkable by human beans, but maybe @Thfcire might like a bottle next time we meet?

My 6 year old Sloe win is now drinkable, that fucker takes fucking ages to mature, the first year it is so dry it strips the lining of your mouth off but becomes less lethal as the years go by. Luckily young folks can't be fucked waiting, I met a whippersnapper of around 40 last year while I was harvesting the brambles and he thought he would make some until I told him that it would take at least 2 years before it was good to go. lazy impatient cunts.

Obviously I don't drink as much as I did before I had my little health wobble, Mrs D makes sure of that, but I still like to make wine, it's handy to give a bottle as a present to people you don't really like - yep, that is almost the entire population of the planet.
"Wheat and Carrot" sounds like the name of a pub not wine ingredients. We picked a lot of blackberries this year (here they're ripe in late June, blueberries and strawberries even earlier) and I was thinking about having a go at making some wine as well, but they're still in the freezer. Lazy impatient cunt is me through and through.
 
Motspur Hotspur

Motspur Hotspur

Player in Training.
Likes
204
#4
So I missed this thread before, I got myself a grapevine a good while ago, completely the wrong type of grapes for wine making but I though fuck it, chucked it all in with some standard sainsburys and some yeast and fermented the ass out of it. Fucking lethal stuff, kind of like raqi on acid, just a drop and you'll be buzzing on it it for hours. Anyway I've got a couple of bottles left that are 'maturing', every now and then I open the bottle and have a taste (it never goes off),currently it's kind of like a weak port flavour which is an improvement. In fact I'm going to have a taste as it's been a while...

yep it's still cheeky!
 
Last edited:
Liam

Liam

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407
#5
I've got a bottle of her Dad's wine he made especially for our wedding and it's fucking dangerous. The Greeks can drink that stuff as they'll sip a glass of it over the course of an hour or two but give it to the English and they'll neck the bottle in o time and deal with the consequences of it afterwards. I've said we need to get a lot of that Mythos piss lager in for the weeding to keep the brits soberish for the first coule of hours of the wedding as starting on his Raki Wine as I call it,or even his standard blow your nut off Raki will be a disaster with the Brits. My mates will be smashing plates and all sorts on that gear.
 
Liam

Liam

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
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407
#6
I'll take a photo of the vineyards he's got over in the Cretan mountains next time I'm over there. Fucking lovely place to get the fuck away from everyone.
 
skiathospurs

skiathospurs

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Founding Member
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3,388
#7
I've got a bottle of her Dad's wine he made especially for our wedding and it's fucking dangerous. The Greeks can drink that stuff as they'll sip a glass of it over the course of an hour or two but give it to the English and they'll neck the bottle in o time and deal with the consequences of it afterwards. I've said we need to get a lot of that Mythos piss lager in for the weeding to keep the brits soberish for the first coule of hours of the wedding as starting on his Raki Wine as I call it,or even his standard blow your nut off Raki will be a disaster with the Brits. My mates will be smashing plates and all sorts on that gear.
preach bruv!! mythos piss lol.
 
Don Diaz

Don Diaz

Zero tolerance of Numpty's
Founding Member
Likes
1,970
#8
My current wife is in the wine industry....I'm not sure we have ever seen a bottle of wheat & carrot, blackberry or Greek wine so far....I'm sure it's delicious....probably.
 
skiathospurs

skiathospurs

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Founding Member
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3,388
#9
My current wife is in the wine industry....I'm not sure we have ever seen a bottle of wheat & carrot, blackberry or Greek wine so far....I'm sure it's delicious....probably.
Greek wine can be pretty awful,but in recent years a lot of very good stuff is made,suprisingly high end.Not suprising for a country bigger than italy with same climate.
 
Liam

Liam

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Likes
407
#10
My current wife is in the wine industry....I'm not sure we have ever seen a bottle of wheat & carrot, blackberry or Greek wine so far....I'm sure it's delicious....probably.
These guys do a good Cretan wine. My Mrs best friends family own it so I get to go out and sup a bit of when I'm out there. Gotta make sure the driver stays sober though as the vineyard is a car journey from the city.

Should probably post the link: http://www.paterianakis.gr/
 
Liam

Liam

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Founding Member
Likes
407
#11
Greek wine can be pretty awful,but in recent years a lot of very good stuff is made,suprisingly high end.Not suprising for a country bigger than italy with same climate.
There's some good stuff I've had out there. A lot of people like to give you their their fathers wine's when I'm out there, they're often more like spirits though.
 
skiathospurs

skiathospurs

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3,388
#12
There's some good stuff I've had out there. A lot of people like to give you their their fathers wine's when I'm out there, they're often more like spirits though.
anything comes in a plastic water bottle homemade is never short on alcohol !!
 
Don Diaz

Don Diaz

Zero tolerance of Numpty's
Founding Member
Likes
1,970
#14
These guys do a good Cretan wine. My Mrs best friends family own it so I get to go out and sup a bit of when I'm out there. Gotta make sure the driver stays sober though as the vineyard is a car journey from the city.

Should probably post the link: http://www.paterianakis.gr/
I'm going to Crete on holiday this year......wifey is in the wine industry so we might go and pay a visit.
 
Liam

Liam

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Founding Member
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407
#18
I'm going to Crete on holiday this year......wifey is in the wine industry so we might go and pay a visit.
I meant to Liam's wife's, friends, family - who passed someone in the street, who's brothers, niece knew someone that sold wine in Greece......not you.
It's her mates uncles third goat that makes the wine actually.
 
skiathospurs

skiathospurs

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Founding Member
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3,388
#20
It's her mates uncles third goat that makes the wine actually.
bet youve never contemplated singing the "sisters your mum" song have you !!
I like the rural greeks,they dont give a flying who you are just enjoying the goodness,if they have a goat or chickens must be good people,its the ones chasing the capitalist dream that are as xenophobic as anywhere else.Sadly the chilled out greeks are a dying breed,younger generations are all about the dosh,status,posing as much as anywhere else.Next generation wont make Raki,tsipouro,wine or anything,theyll all be on chicken tonight,pkt feta and frozen moussaka.
 
Liam

Liam

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Likes
407
#21
bet youve never contemplated singing the "sisters your mum" song have you !!
I like the rural greeks,they dont give a flying who you are just enjoying the goodness,if they have a goat or chickens must be good people,its the ones chasing the capitalist dream that are as xenophobic as anywhere else.Sadly the chilled out greeks are a dying breed,younger generations are all about the dosh,status,posing as much as anywhere else.Next generation wont make Raki,tsipouro,wine or anything,theyll all be on chicken tonight,pkt feta and frozen moussaka.
You're not too far wrong mate. Most of the Greeks I know in the UK have actually kept there own traditions passed down from family but a lot of the Greeks I know in in Heraklion, Athens, and Thessaloniki are more into showing off what they have got. Might be a symptom of the harsh reality that most have fuck all really as the economy is fuckeried to fuck.
 

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