Breaking News Re Lamela:
Without a doubt, Erik Lamela has been one of Spurs most ferociously feminal players. But given EL's history of so many gender specific issues which have plagued him for years & were a source of frustration, physically & emotionally, to fans, the club, & the person, something had to be undertaken.
Hence, EL has committed to a change.
This is a long continuum that involves various stages.
To hasten EL's evolution, he has opted to forego the Non-Binary (enby) which acts as a brief period of emotional stabilization prior to transitioning to a more somatic alteration. This phase will act as EL's cocoon period where a massive horse-like genitalia will develop, incubate, & eventually protrude from & thus replace EL's vagina.
This should theoretically alleviate any further feminine issues (but, according to numerous long suffering married women, opens up a whole other can of worms). This formal emergence as a "Man's Manly Man" should be extremely pleasing to fans & club alike. No more niggling vaginal redness, itching, discharge, odour, or other far more more complex issues that have greatly inhibited EL's time & performance on the pitch.
Imagine.
Lamela more manly.
But my one initial reservation was, "what he may be like with the elimination of his PMS aggressiveness"? We males know its wrath.
On further thought, never mind. His thoroughbred balls will more than compensate. All I can say is "Look Out".
*this post in not intended to offend any male or female or any being in between.
My God, I just wasted 6 minutes & 37 seconds of my life on this ridiculous post. FML. Lamela, just succeed in whatever incarnation you choose.
