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Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
Likes
1,567
#91
We're going on a 4 hour road trip tomorrow to try and get our residency sorted. Every national cop-shop in Spain has in the words of our lawyer 'collapsed', cos everyone and his granny is trying to get the precious green form saying they're kosher residents before the UK drawbridge is pulled up and you lot are truly fucked.

The legal lady managed to snag us an appointment in the shit-hole affectionately known as Torreviega for tomorrow (fucking miles away) and every time we think we've got all the paperwork the feds ask for something else. Apparently our hundreds of years old marriage certificate is no good as ALL documents in Spain must be less than three months old, so £50 to get a new copy DHL'd from Blighty. Then they want a certificate from our bank proving we actually have a bank account and have paid money in, passports, copies of passports, NIE, Padron registration, title deeds, transfer of title deeds (authorised),Spanish tax registration forms, UK bank statements, S1 forms from the UK government, proof of income, proof of funds and a pint of blood!

I am not optimistic. We went to a meeting held by the British consul yesterday and she said we 'should' be fine, but every feds office has different rules, let her know if they say no - which will be fucking triffic after a 6 am start to drive a million miles to the pox-hole of Torreviega (OK, it's not that bad, but there are fucking fish and chip shops and British pubs there) - and paying a lawyer €500 for sorting out the paperwork and doing the lingo to plod.
 
USspur

USspur

Player in Training.
Likes
25
#92
We're going on a 4 hour road trip tomorrow to try and get our residency sorted. Every national cop-shop in Spain has in the words of our lawyer 'collapsed', cos everyone and his granny is trying to get the precious green form saying they're kosher residents before the UK drawbridge is pulled up and you lot are truly fucked.

The legal lady managed to snag us an appointment in the shit-hole affectionately known as Torreviega for tomorrow (fucking miles away) and every time we think we've got all the paperwork the feds ask for something else. Apparently our hundreds of years old marriage certificate is no good as ALL documents in Spain must be less than three months old, so £50 to get a new copy DHL'd from Blighty. Then they want a certificate from our bank proving we actually have a bank account and have paid money in, passports, copies of passports, NIE, Padron registration, title deeds, transfer of title deeds (authorised),Spanish tax registration forms, UK bank statements, S1 forms from the UK government, proof of income, proof of funds and a pint of blood!

I am not optimistic. We went to a meeting held by the British consul yesterday and she said we 'should' be fine, but every feds office has different rules, let her know if they say no - which will be fucking triffic after a 6 am start to drive a million miles to the pox-hole of Torreviega (OK, it's not that bad, but there are fucking fish and chip shops and British pubs there) - and paying a lawyer €500 for sorting out the paperwork and doing the lingo to plod.
Sounds right fuxked. Is this all due to brexit?
 
skiathospurs

skiathospurs

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Likes
4,457
#93
Sounds right fuxked. Is this all due to brexit?
No doubt because of the time frame and people coming out of they grey areas to sort themselves out,but if its like greece its bureaucracy in general.The word member states is misleading because they are still soverign countries and a lot of hoop jumping required.My reality here is still no one really cares,whether that will change soon?who knows,when I went for residency permits years back the police said why,you dont need this (in effect we dont care).
Try and imagine say california leaving the union and all the paperwork then required to move in or out for work,or living,and now imagine you give yourself 2 weeks to sort that out.
 
Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
Likes
1,567
#94
Sounds right fuxked. Is this all due to brexit?
Yep. Completely down to Brexit. The Spanish government have promised to carry on with all the benefits including healthcare for registered residents - as long as the British government do the same with Spaniards in the UK, and they would be fucking mental not o as 450,000 flying home for healthcare would fuck the NHS even more than it already is.

10 fucking hours later we are home - with official Resedencia Cards! We got the cop-shop at 8.30, sat down with the grumpy policeman at 9.00. The padron (Town Hall registration) was wrong, big discussion with our lawyer for 10 minutes, he eventually got his boss to reluctantly agree it. All the documents we had taken, that our lawyer had translated were unacceptable, so we had to find an official translator to create authorised copies, €200 more in the bin. The certified bank statement we had was wrong as it only showed the income - which is what they have always asked for so we had to find a branch of our bank and get them to provide a certified balance, then we returned to the Police station at 12:30 - No, they only accepted documents until 12:00! So the lawyer discussed and explained we had travelled hundreds of kilometres, we smiled nicely and called the copper Segnor, eventually he relented and he accepted the documents and we sat outside and waited for what seemed like days until he came back and bunged us our green cards!

With the lawyers fees, translations, copies of UK marriage certificates etc, it has cost us about a grand, some plank at the consul meeting said we should do it ourselves and save the money, yeah right, how the fuck we would have dealt with all the bollocks this morning without a Spanish expert is beyond my comprehension. There are no appointments anywhere in the Allicante province for 6 months, she has been phoning every day and got us this 2 weeks before Brexit appointment which was a fecking miracle, anybody getting residency now will be lucky, but fuck them we've got ours!
 
N

NiceOneCyril

Player in Training.
Likes
80
#95
Congratulations - you are now officially an ex-pat and entitled to say "when I go back to blighty" and "the only things I miss are the television and the pubs"
 
Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
Likes
1,567
#96
Congratulations - you are now officially an ex-pat and entitled to say "when I go back to blighty" and "the only things I miss are the television and the pubs"
Proper tomato sauce, beaked beans, Ingerlish sausages, rain, squirrels, fish n chips - all some of he things we haven't got here, so I am am as happy as Pedro, Fuck you pats (if I am an expat then are you pats? Dunno).

It is a huge fucking relief, now we just have to wait five years to get permanent residency, if we lose our green cards we are fucked apparently, we can't get a replacement and the whole circus has to start again, I am guarding that fucker with my life!
 
TettenhallHotspur

TettenhallHotspur

Player in Training.
Likes
78
#97
if we lose our green cards we are fucked apparently, we can't get a replacement and the whole circus has to start again, I am guarding that fucker with my life!
Make sure you do mate. I speak from experience when I say losing it is a nightmare. What a palava (is that how you spell palava? - don't think I've ever written it before).
Call this number, speak to a grumpy person. Go back to the pay machine. Press the intercom. Explain the situation in the pissing rain to another grumpy person. Pause conversation cos child needs a wee. Go McDonald's toilets. Come back speak to grumpy person over intercom. Explain that you're not trying to pull a fast one. Give up. Pay £25 and be on your way grumpy as hell.

Ok so I lost an NCP car park ticket in Birmingham yesterday. Perhaps not quite the same. But if you were planning on keeping your green card in your left hand coat pocket for the next 5 years, I suggest moving it to somewhere more secure like your Mrs suggested in the first place.
 
Don Diaz

Don Diaz

Zero tolerance of Numpty's
Founding Member
Likes
2,713
#98
Make sure you do mate. I speak from experience when I say losing it is a nightmare. What a palava (is that how you spell palava? - don't think I've ever written it before).
Call this number, speak to a grumpy person. Go back to the pay machine. Press the intercom. Explain the situation in the pissing rain to another grumpy person. Pause conversation cos child needs a wee. Go McDonald's toilets. Come back speak to grumpy person over intercom. Explain that you're not trying to pull a fast one. Give up. Pay £25 and be on your way grumpy as hell.

Ok so I lost an NCP car park ticket in Birmingham yesterday. Perhaps not quite the same. But if you were planning on keeping your green card in your left hand coat pocket for the next 5 years, I suggest moving it to somewhere more secure like your Mrs suggested in the first place.
Brilliant
 

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