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The Covid 19 Lurgy

Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
People are renting out their dogs so folks can go walkies here. Plod are cracking down and you have to take your own ID and proof that the pooch is yours. There has been a van going round with a loudspeaker telling people what to do but my Spanglish wasn't good enough to understand a fecking word because they speak Valencian here not proper Spanglish. All the info is on the local town hall website so we know what we are allowed to do - fuck-all basically, we can go out, not together, with ID to buy food or medicine and .... fuck-all else,

Day 3 banged up, I am just about managing to cope. 48 cans of beer left, 20 bottles of vino tinto and I think Mrs D has got some food in so we should be OK for a day or two. A stroke of luck! The boss told me to buy kitchen rolls a few weeks ago and I bought bog rolls - so with the help of the bidet (a European foot washing device) we should be able to keep our downstairs departments nice and clean. It's freezing cold and damp at the moment, OK, not Ingerlund type freezing but after 3 or 4 weeks of mid 20's, 16 degrees feels right parky. Being locked down in a tiny 160 square meter house is .... fucking nice really, so I think we'll survive the weeks or months. The only problem is that we are down to about 20 oranges left on our tree but if I nip out at night in dark clothes I can pick some from the 8 millions other trees round here.
 
Motspur Hotspur

Motspur Hotspur

Player in Training.
People are renting out their dogs so folks can go walkies here. Plod are cracking down and you have to take your own ID and proof that the pooch is yours. There has been a van going round with a loudspeaker telling people what to do but my Spanglish wasn't good enough to understand a fecking word because they speak Valencian here not proper Spanglish. All the info is on the local town hall website so we know what we are allowed to do - fuck-all basically, we can go out, not together, with ID to buy food or medicine and .... fuck-all else,

Day 3 banged up, I am just about managing to cope. 48 cans of beer left, 20 bottles of vino tinto and I think Mrs D has got some food in so we should be OK for a day or two. A stroke of luck! The boss told me to buy kitchen rolls a few weeks ago and I bought bog rolls - so with the help of the bidet (a European foot washing device) we should be able to keep our downstairs departments nice and clean. It's freezing cold and damp at the moment, OK, not Ingerlund type freezing but after 3 or 4 weeks of mid 20's, 16 degrees feels right parky. Being locked down in a tiny 160 square meter house is .... fucking nice really, so I think we'll survive the weeks or months. The only problem is that we are down to about 20 oranges left on our tree but if I nip out at night in dark clothes I can pick some from the 8 millions other trees round here.
Marmalade! It's the future.
 
Motspur Hotspur

Motspur Hotspur

Player in Training.
Day 4 of looney shopping today and the hysteria shows no sign of abating. What I find utterly perplexing is the amount of surprise that there is no hand sanitizer available! I mean, do these people live in a hole?

In amongst it all some really lovely stories. After having to endure the store opening and swarms that devoured the stock (which is demoralising in itself) I had to ask two customers to stop bickering over queuing and who was going next, an experience that threatened to escalate into something nasty at which point I blew up to a colleague mentioning it is also my birthday! A lady doing her shopping heard and wished me a happy birthday!

That was nice.
 
skiathospurs

skiathospurs

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Day 4 of looney shopping today and the hysteria shows no sign of abating. What I find utterly perplexing is the amount of surprise that there is no hand sanitizer available! I mean, do these people live in a hole?

In amongst it all some really lovely stories. After having to endure the store opening and swarms that devoured the stock (which is demoralising in itself) I had to ask two customers to stop bickering over queuing and who was going next, an experience that threatened to escalate into something nasty at which point I blew up to a colleague mentioning it is also my birthday! A lady doing her shopping heard and wished me a happy birthday!

That was nice.
Happy birthday!!
There are recipes for making your own sanitizer,havent looked myself but my missus will be into that if it doesnt use nasty pesticide/chemical guff.
 
skiathospurs

skiathospurs

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Island is officially closed off now,politically its a bit feudal here with mayors having a lot of power,he has decided no more passengers on flights or ferries coming or going except emergencies.Boats will still come to deliver stuff.Dont know if all of greece has taken this measure or just this island?dont care wasnt planning on a trip anyway.
 
USspur

USspur

Player in Training.
could use some good indian food about now... or thai...
 
Motspur Hotspur

Motspur Hotspur

Player in Training.
I can report all is solid in the Motspur household this morning! Toilet roll stocks holding up well, gin has taken a definite downward trend which is a little worrying however a birthday bottle of bourbon appeared to replenish things so that's nice.
 
Don Diaz

Don Diaz

Zero tolerance of Numpty's
Founding Member
I can report all is solid in the Motspur household this morning! Toilet roll stocks holding up well, gin has taken a definite downward trend which is a little worrying however a birthday bottle of bourbon appeared to replenish things so that's nice.
Happy Birthday Al, have a good one. see you soon.
 
Wotspur

Wotspur

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Well I went to Sainsbury’s on Thursday pm , could only get some mushrooms , 3 peppers and that was it ! And worse there was no beer ,apart from 4 tins of Holstein , thank fuck I managed to get some wife beater from Asda yesterday.
still no toilet paper ,anywhere ,so I bought a job lot of lettuce .......cause this cou,d be the tip of the iceberg
 

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Wotspur

Wotspur

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
It seems the smaller supermarkets are the places to go , I managed to get some weetabix and tomato sauce yesterday. We are lucky in that Lois runs a nursery ,and she buys hand Sanatiser by the truck load anyway , so we have a constant supply .......think we could start selling it off ,to earn enough to see us through this , being self employed I am well and truly f3cked
 

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Wotspur

Wotspur

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Gallows humour is all we have left .
feel so sorry for my daughters age group ,they’ve been psyching themselves up for their GCSE’s in June , their school prom ( so important to them esp for girls , all that dressing up and parties , and then Reading festival , in Aug, the first two definitely cancelled ,and Reading will probably go as well .
i know Boris and Trump aren’t the most popular of people , but I think they’ve handled the situation very well , not jumping on the shut down straight away , there’s a video down on utube , done by a friends Son in-law, showing why the Govt HAD to let it come in Slowly and “ controllable” , the NHS couldn't have coped , if it all happened overnight .
to all the anti Trump people , objecting to him called it the Chinese Flu .....we’ll tough , the Spanish were the country responsible for the last major pandemic
 

Attachments

Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
Gallows humour is all we have left .
feel so sorry for my daughters age group ,they’ve been psyching themselves up for their GCSE’s in June , their school prom ( so important to them esp for girls , all that dressing up and parties , and then Reading festival , in Aug, the first two definitely cancelled ,and Reading will probably go as well .
i know Boris and Trump aren’t the most popular of people , but I think they’ve handled the situation very well , not jumping on the shut down straight away , there’s a video down on utube , done by a friends Son in-law, showing why the Govt HAD to let it come in Slowly and “ controllable” , the NHS couldn't have coped , if it all happened overnight .
to all the anti Trump people , objecting to him called it the Chinese Flu .....we’ll tough , the Spanish were the country responsible for the last major pandemic
Fuck me you lot will jump on anything that blames foreigners won't you? The Spanish were NOT responsible for Spanish flu. Why not do some research before you throw your xenophobic shit all over the internet? Oh of course, it was on Youtube so it must be true. Bollocks, total fucking bollocks.

Trump and Johnson handling the situation well? That's priceless that one. Did Youtube tell you that as well?
 
Yid

Yid

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
What ever happened to Dominic Cummins....

That sankey fucker seems to have self isolated from public announcements and controversial suggestions to his hand puppet the prime minister...

He has well and truly distanced himself from this shit storm.

#propercunt
 
Motspur Hotspur

Motspur Hotspur

Player in Training.
What ever happened to Dominic Cummins....

That sankey fucker seems to have self isolated from public announcements and controversial suggestions to his hand puppet the prime minister...

He has well and truly distanced himself from this shit storm.

#propercunt
Are you sure? Amazing how all of a sudden there these 'I don't care what you say (and I am no fan) Boris is doing an amazing job' posts appearing.

When really it's been an absolute cluster fuck since the virus broke seriously in Italy.
 
Thfcire

Thfcire

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
I’m sorry anyone thinking it was a good idea to not closed the schools last week is a fucking thick .the backtracking by both boris and trump is amazing they know they’ve fucked up .this takes two to three weeks to show up so the small numbers at the moment won’t last long .taking the decision to go for the herd approach with no evidence that it protects against further versions is not only silly but it’s criminal .why do you think they’re jumping straight to offering people money ?? I give up
 
Yid

Yid

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Are you sure? Amazing how all of a sudden there these 'I don't care what you say (and I am no fan) Boris is doing an amazing job' posts appearing.

When really it's been an absolute cluster fuck since the virus broke seriously in Italy.
What I'm saying was Dominic Cunmins was slipping into the political forefront and being seen, photographed, interviewed etc as part of his role as PM advisor.... not seen him for about a month and the whitless twat PM has been left to stand like a scarecrow on his Jack taking the hits.

That's the job the cunt wanted...

What I would say is Johnson is alone and you can tell he is not enjoying this one little bit.

Effectively we as a country are at war along with the rest of the world.

The money that's popped up is the countries war chest and we are following protocols straight out of that play book...

However, would anyone follow BJ into battle.... would they fuck.

Incidentally he isnt doing a good job, he is deferring all responsibility to advisors. He is a fucking mouthpiece and that's all he is. He has no fucking clue what's going on and didnt sign up for this...
 
Motspur Hotspur

Motspur Hotspur

Player in Training.
Am I talking swaheli lately? Everything I type gets countered when in fact I am agreeing - he is a fucking mouth piece. Sigh...
 
Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
Lucky that you lot have Boris or Trump to make sure you only get the mild Covid virus. Here in Spain we have the serious version of the virus so we are not allowed to go out to parks or markets and act like we were all having a jolly holiday Our Covid is a right bastard, we can only go out, individually to buy food or medicine, you chaps are lucky with having the mild Boris Covid - you can go to the park, walk along the beach, visit markets. Luckily despite having the serious foreigner's Covid, we have less selfish cunts here and the supermarkets are all well stocked, no queues, no aggro, security staff ensuring one in and one out and we of course have plenty of bog rolls.

They are great aren't they those Laurel and Hardy world leader blokes, They give you mild Covid and a side order of Brexit, no need for proper shutdowns in the UK, all you need is for Bojo to say in his serious voices that people should maybe, possibly, consider not visiting their mum on mother's day. With strong leadership like that you lot will be over Covid 19 way before us. I hope you don't mind if we keep the doors locked for six months or so just after Boris says he's got Covid done - just in case he's lying.

Fucking useless cunts Trump and Johnson, they don't give a fuck about people, they would not give a fuck if tens of thousands of people died, it would be a price worth paying - as long as they are not the ones paying that price. Too little, too late, too fucking useless - but the flag wavers still love them eh? You'd think those facist cunts would like a total lock down with soldiers on the streets shooting foreigners with runny noses?
 
Dorset

Dorset

The Voice Of Reason
Founding Member
Am I talking swaheli lately? Everything I type gets countered when in fact I am agreeing - he is a fucking mouth piece. Sigh...
Maybe you're looking at people in a funny tone of voice? I was confused as well by the reactions, but as I don't want to be picked on by the bullies, I will join in - 'What you talking about ? Agreeing with people? Cunt!'
 
Yid

Yid

Well-Known Member
Founding Member
Am I talking swaheli lately? Everything I type gets countered when in fact I am agreeing - he is a fucking mouth piece. Sigh...
I wasn't disagreeing... I dont think. Fuck knows...!!! Without Spurs to moan about my fucking heads gone to mush...
 
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